I am after the American Dream, but it is def in the wrong country. I really am convinced that I am never going to achieve the things that I need to at this pace. My job is so shaky right now, the funds to get a beautiful yet manageable home are dashed. I pray to God everyday, but I know he has bigger things to attend to than my middle aged yearnings. I hope that I can, but the reality is I know I can't. Woe is me.